My Dear Diary
sarcastra Diary Friday 9, January 2009  

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I like to dance in my underpants while singing offkey to Motown every Friday morning. One day I'll make it onto American Idol and will most definitely make it to the blooper reel of the casting auditions. If that doesn't pan out, I guess I'll be a doctor.
The Adventures of Cpt. Awesome!
by sarcastra
Age: 22  Sex: F

880 Entries
# Entry Date
1 Epic Fail 03/12/2008 11:44 GMT-5
2 Leftover Turkey Sandwhiches 30/11/2008 11:31 GMT-5
3 I don't update this thing 07/11/2008 11:59 GMT-5
4 Oooh, the Irony 09/10/2008 10:03 GMT-5
5 *head scratches* 28/09/2008 10:03 GMT-5
6 Ugh 09/09/2008 01:13 GMT-5
7 Bellydance Photos 15/08/2008 09:01 GMT-5
8 Ugh....Education 14/08/2008 10:41 GMT-5
9 Awkward 07/08/2008 06:29 GMT-5
10 Good Grief... 03/08/2008 02:54 GMT-5
11 Dehli Belly 02/08/2008 02:00 GMT-5
12 I Want Out 01/07/2008 10:04 GMT-5
13 The College Dropout 27/06/2008 09:09 GMT-5
14 Spitting Venom 26/06/2008 12:12 GMT-5
15 Robo boogie 21/06/2008 03:41 GMT-5
16 My Snatch Doesn't Cure Cancer 16/06/2008 11:08 GMT-5
17 Ugh... 14/06/2008 09:22 GMT-5
18 Bellydance and Baltimore 11/06/2008 11:07 GMT-5
19 It's Good to Be Smart 01/06/2008 09:19 GMT-5
20 I'm so Bmore 30/05/2008 09:40 GMT-5
21 Apparently, I'm Racist 22/05/2008 11:13 GMT-5
22 What Do You Do? 14/05/2008 09:04 GMT-5
23 Radiohead LIVE 11/05/2008 10:51 GMT-5
24 Who Wants To Marry a Fat Chick? 06/05/2008 07:37 GMT-5
25 You Ain't Worth it 02/05/2008 09:46 GMT-5
26 Proof of God 01/05/2008 10:07 GMT-5
27 Final Countdown... 29/04/2008 09:19 GMT-5
28 Bombay or Bust 24/04/2008 12:11 GMT-5
29 A Little Better 22/04/2008 10:28 GMT-5
30 Home is Where the Hatred Is 20/04/2008 04:13 GMT-5
31 Record Apreciation Day 19/04/2008 10:25 GMT-5
32 Have You Ever Made Love to a Weerdo? 14/04/2008 09:20 GMT-5
33 Don't Talk To Strangers 05/04/2008 10:13 GMT-5
34 Slightly Ahead the Joke Curve 03/04/2008 07:31 GMT-5
35 I'm tired 26/03/2008 06:56 GMT-5
36 I Play Viola 25/03/2008 11:54 GMT-5
37 Miss Guided 24/03/2008 12:34 GMT-5
38 Naturally 20/03/2008 09:53 GMT-5
39 An Interactive Filler 14/03/2008 11:29 GMT-5
40 I Might Graduate "On Time" 13/03/2008 12:34 GMT-5
41 Evolution of Sex 10/03/2008 10:23 GMT-5
42 I Love Youtube 09/03/2008 11:12 GMT-5
43 When I Feel Sad 04/03/2008 01:08 GMT-5
44 You Smell Like Soap 03/03/2008 09:28 GMT-5
45 Too Many Reasons 29/02/2008 10:55 GMT-5
46 You! Out the Gene Pool! 27/02/2008 10:49 GMT-5
47 Acceleration Due To Gravity 25/02/2008 03:50 GMT-5
48 Dance Junkie 20/02/2008 11:28 GMT-5
49 Karma Police 18/02/2008 12:17 GMT-5
50 Radiohead 13/02/2008 06:10 GMT-5
51 Uhhh... 08/02/2008 07:15 GMT-5
52 Plaza Sesamo! 05/02/2008 10:28 GMT-5
53 Spare Parts 30/01/2008 11:05 GMT-5
54 Let's Celebrate Integration 21/01/2008 08:07 GMT-5
55 Homesick 16/01/2008 03:43 GMT-5
56 Is This Really Mine? 10/01/2008 11:48 GMT-5
57 One Two Three *Jumps* 09/01/2008 12:31 GMT-5
58 Oh, the Humanity 08/01/2008 11:54 GMT-5
59 It's Oh So Quiet 04/01/2008 12:02 GMT-5
60 Hip Drop It Like It's Hot 04/01/2008 10:45 GMT-5
61 My New Years Resolution 31/12/2007 11:45 GMT-5
62 Pessimistic New Years 30/12/2007 05:46 GMT-5
63 Hurricane Nazi Panda 27/12/2007 12:40 GMT-5
64 A Not So Holiday Season... 25/12/2007 05:01 GMT-5
65 My Life As The Other Woman... 22/12/2007 12:52 GMT-5
66 Packing 19/12/2007 08:02 GMT-5
67 Whorespace, a place for Johns 14/12/2007 07:55 GMT-5
68 Finals 11/12/2007 10:26 GMT-5
69 I Think I'm leaving MDD 25/10/2007 10:04 GMT-5
70 Thank's for the memories 24/10/2007 09:25 GMT-5
71 I'm Sorry, I'm Not Into Racism 22/10/2007 11:11 GMT-5
72 6th Year Anniversary on MDD!!! 19/10/2007 12:11 GMT-5
73 You Can Do It 18/10/2007 10:46 GMT-5
74 Jigsaw 16/10/2007 03:22 GMT-5
75 Thom Yorke's a Genius 11/10/2007 10:40 GMT-5
76 Decisions, Decisions [pics] 08/10/2007 04:34 GMT-5
77 Biznitch Better Bring It: 06/10/2007 12:43 GMT-5
78 Today, I felt like crying 03/10/2007 11:40 GMT-5
79 800th Entry 01/10/2007 10:37 GMT-5
80 A little weird, but hey! [pics +vid] 28/09/2007 03:30 GMT-5
81 The Not So Real Thing 27/09/2007 06:54 GMT-5
82 Margaritas and Brimstone 26/09/2007 06:39 GMT-5
83 iDunno 25/09/2007 10:05 GMT-5
84 My poor lappy 20/09/2007 10:15 GMT-5
85 No Law for Gauss 19/09/2007 01:59 GMT-5
86 Some Days You Just Wanna Get ... Y'know 16/09/2007 08:25 GMT-5
87 Ajaja 11/09/2007 12:57 GMT-5
88 I can't even be upset 08/09/2007 08:49 GMT-5
89 Grrr...I'm Angry. Grrr 04/09/2007 12:49 GMT-5
90 This is Dcon! [PICS] 02/09/2007 09:52 GMT-5
91 I'ld Pull Out My Hair But, I Like it Too Much 29/08/2007 10:40 GMT-5
92 Cold Shower of Justice! 26/08/2007 10:49 GMT-5
93 Say Wha? 22/08/2007 01:57 GMT-5
94 Wear Sunscreen 20/08/2007 03:32 GMT-5
95 I still want my time machine 18/08/2007 12:25 GMT-5
96 I feel so horrible about this, but... 16/08/2007 12:05 GMT-5
97 See me Drive my Car 13/08/2007 12:13 GMT-5
98 Fat Can't Dance 07/08/2007 10:50 GMT-5
99 After the con... 26/07/2007 02:47 GMT-5
100 Petite Jamila is AWESOME [PICS] 16/07/2007 11:55 GMT-5
101 It Was Just Another Thursday (Still in 2D) 30/06/2007 07:59 GMT-5
102 I'm 21!!!!!! 27/06/2007 10:53 GMT-5
103 Stabby McGee 25/06/2007 08:16 GMT-5
104 Party Like it's 1699 22/06/2007 11:09 GMT-5
105 Commence Happy Dance 22/06/2007 08:42 GMT-5
106 Hopalong Cassidy w/pics 19/06/2007 08:48 GMT-5
107 Like a Dummy 17/06/2007 11:09 GMT-5
108 Little Black Bag 14/06/2007 11:28 GMT-5
109 Phone Tags and Codes 13/06/2007 05:30 GMT-5
110 If You Wrote a Song About Me... 12/06/2007 10:41 GMT-5
111 Big Time Sensuality 10/06/2007 03:06 GMT-5
112 Poor Man's Copyright 09/06/2007 12:28 GMT-5
113 Cindy Mayweather 07/06/2007 10:53 GMT-5
114 Wait! It's Impossible 04/06/2007 10:26 GMT-5
115 I Should Go To Bed, But 03/06/2007 11:50 GMT-5
116 And Now They're Comming After You... 03/06/2007 07:35 GMT-5
117 Going, going, gone (semi-private tomorrow) 31/05/2007 10:21 GMT-5
118 Expired c.ondoms from the brands that never break 30/05/2007 11:04 GMT-5
119 Read My Hips 29/05/2007 10:17 GMT-5
120 I Think I Need A Bigger One 28/05/2007 10:23 GMT-5
121 Going Semi-Private Again... 27/05/2007 10:59 GMT-5
122 Wait, I think it is... 25/05/2007 02:07 GMT-5
123 Spittin it back random.... 22/05/2007 10:18 GMT-5
124 WHALE!!! 20/05/2007 05:15 GMT-5
125 I Feel So Lame For This 16/05/2007 11:34 GMT-5
126 Hobbit Fetish 14/05/2007 06:07 GMT-5
127 So it was you all along 11/05/2007 10:03 GMT-5
128 Quick Ref 10/05/2007 09:29 GMT-5
129 Tipsy McStagger 10/05/2007 08:33 GMT-5
130 Put it down like.... wha? 07/05/2007 07:29 GMT-5
131 You Don't Have a Face for Porn 06/05/2007 08:37 GMT-5
132 A Throwback Entry 03/05/2007 07:27 GMT-5
133 Poop 27/04/2007 04:58 GMT-5
134 Someone's worse off than you... 24/04/2007 10:56 GMT-5
135 My Legacy 22/04/2007 01:15 GMT-5
136 Somthing's Gonna Steal My Carbon 21/04/2007 06:37 GMT-5
137 OMG It's Nakey! 19/04/2007 11:21 GMT-5
138 Technical ER 17/04/2007 03:40 GMT-5
139 Kit Kat Bars 17/04/2007 01:36 GMT-5
140 I Get It In The End 15/04/2007 04:59 GMT-5
141 The Light Bleaches My Fecal Matter 13/04/2007 11:00 GMT-5
142 You Stole My Juicebox! 12/04/2007 11:39 GMT-5
143 Imitation Bacon Bits 08/04/2007 09:30 GMT-5
144 Incredible Shrinking Woman 07/04/2007 11:15 GMT-5
145 My new buddy 04/04/2007 10:39 GMT-5
146 Wait, When Did This Happen? 03/04/2007 11:06 GMT-5
147 High Five 02/04/2007 12:23 GMT-5
148 On this side....with crackers and cheese 02/04/2007 03:40 GMT-5
149 Screw This, I'm Becoming a Stripper 31/03/2007 09:22 GMT-5
150 Um, so yeah 29/03/2007 10:08 GMT-5
151 Allergic to Sperm 28/03/2007 02:31 GMT-5
152 Children are Spawns From Hell 24/03/2007 10:09 GMT-5
153 My Broken Gaydar 22/03/2007 14:59 GMT-5
154 Somebooty Scream! 21/03/2007 10:29 GMT-5
155 Temporarily Public 20/03/2007 19:23 GMT-5
156 I should be sleeping but... 19/03/2007 11:21 GMT-5
157 Plz comment on my melodrama -[pics]- 17/03/2007 11:16 GMT-5
158 Physics for Poets 15/03/2007 11:58 GMT-5
159 Unlike you, it doesn't discriminate 14/03/2007 11:06 GMT-5
160 Warning: Highly Corrosive 13/03/2007 11:47 GMT-5
161 Coffee and TV 10/03/2007 09:27 GMT-5
162 Chain Letters 09/03/2007 09:52 GMT-5
163 Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? 09/03/2007 08:25 GMT-5
164 You Ex Boyfriend, He Did What? 08/03/2007 11:27 GMT-5
165 Tonight, tonight 07/03/2007 11:35 GMT-5
166 Could You Bmore Ugly? 06/03/2007 11:36 GMT-5
167 Invisible Weaving 03/03/2007 11:24 GMT-5
168 I Needs Da Monies 27/02/2007 02:28 GMT-5
169 Dissapointment of Candy 26/02/2007 02:26 GMT-5
170 Expired Condoms 23/02/2007 01:04 GMT-5
171 99% of All the People You'll Meet in College 20/02/2007 10:27 GMT-5
172 Don't Shut My Mouth 16/02/2007 11:52 GMT-5
173 It's Just a Wednesday 14/02/2007 08:44 GMT-5
174 Reading is Fun...damental 12/02/2007 10:30 GMT-5
175 And the Bottom Drops Out 08/02/2007 11:28 GMT-5
176 Boots are soo much better than booty 06/02/2007 11:50 GMT-5
177 Dah! My virgin....toenails! 04/02/2007 12:28 GMT-5
178 700+1 Entry Extravaganza!!! 02/02/2007 12:29 GMT-5
179 Gimme One Chance 01/02/2007 05:07 GMT-5
180 Who the hell brought this in? 27/01/2007 09:11 GMT-5
181 Turn for the not so great 25/01/2007 12:36 GMT-5
182 Frustration 23/01/2007 11:20 GMT-5
183 Quickie 19/01/2007 10:38 GMT-5
184 Paper or Plastic 16/01/2007 11:18 GMT-5
185 The Good Times Are Killing Me 14/01/2007 11:38 GMT-5
186 10 Things I Want to do Before I Die 08/01/2007 12:57 GMT-5
187 2007: A year and some change 02/01/2007 09:41 GMT-5
188 It's 1am, And I'm Still Awake 30/12/2006 01:05 GMT-5
189 When a Curse is a Blessing 28/12/2006 10:22 GMT-5
190 Where Dreams May Take You 27/12/2006 09:33 GMT-5
191 Dick in a Box 24/12/2006 01:38 GMT-5
192 Sandwhiches on Rye 22/12/2006 12:30 GMT-5
193 It's a Madworld 21/12/2006 01:58 GMT-5
194 Oh the Gyllmanity 20/12/2006 10:28 GMT-5
195 Inspiration 16/12/2006 10:19 GMT-5
196 I'm A Smart One 15/12/2006 09:27 GMT-5
197 Global Warming Kills Penguins 13/12/2006 12:00 GMT-5
198 The Ends Justified The Means 11/12/2006 11:41 GMT-5
199 Freakin' A, Man. Freakin' A 06/12/2006 09:06 GMT-5
200 I Should Bottle This & Sell It for $12.95 +s/h 27/11/2006 11:16 GMT-5
201 Give Me One Page 26/11/2006 01:26 GMT-5
202 Procrastination 25/11/2006 10:10 GMT-5
203 Oooh, she's got personality. 19/11/2006 11:29 GMT-5
204 Are you Hot or Not? 19/11/2006 09:28 GMT-5
205 I'ld bring sexy back, but they don't do refunds 17/11/2006 12:18 GMT-5
206 I took pictures 17/11/2006 05:26 GMT-5
207 Do I creep you out 15/11/2006 10:54 GMT-5
208 End is the only part of the word that I heard 13/11/2006 12:35 GMT-5
209 DAHHH!!! 13/11/2006 12:07 GMT-5
210 Everyone wants a Zwinky, I think.... 04/11/2006 02:29 GMT-5
211 Pittsburgh and the Lack of Sleep 28/10/2006 12:25 GMT-5
212 Whiplash! 18/10/2006 12:55 GMT-5
213 My nose 17/10/2006 12:34 GMT-5
214 What I do now? 15/10/2006 07:20 GMT-5
215 Thas some ole bullsh... 13/10/2006 01:05 GMT-5
216 Who stole my chicken sandwhich 11/10/2006 11:59 GMT-5
217 Mommy, can we keep it? 08/10/2006 09:24 GMT-5
218 Midnight Ramble 05/10/2006 11:24 GMT-5
219 Humans as Ornaments 05/10/2006 02:45 GMT-5
220 I'm sad.....just sad 04/10/2006 09:32 GMT-5
221 I Wonder What's Next 03/10/2006 02:44 GMT-5
222 Does Pursuit of Happiness Include Stalking? 02/10/2006 04:27 GMT-5
223 Hmmm, When Did This Happen? 29/09/2006 07:39 GMT-5
224 Still So Sore 27/09/2006 09:04 GMT-5
225 I AM ALIVE 27/09/2006 04:29 GMT-5
226 Um, so yeah 20/09/2006 01:32 GMT-5
227 I think everything sounds better in Russian... 18/09/2006 11:52 GMT-5
228 Well, hey there my li'l chickadee 17/09/2006 08:24 GMT-5
229 Shuckie Duckies 16/09/2006 02:48 GMT-5
230 Harder to Breathe 12/09/2006 08:19 GMT-5
231 Oh Noes....(updated) 11/09/2006 11:07 GMT-5
232 Side Entry: Waiting 07/09/2006 07:49 GMT-5
233 Where'd it go yo? 04/09/2006 09:57 GMT-5
234 Face Down, Eyes Close 02/09/2006 07:40 GMT-5
235 Dangerous Curves Ahead (pics) 01/09/2006 10:39 GMT-5
236 Tripped 31/08/2006 01:24 GMT-5
237 Side Entry: Broken iPod Ramble 30/08/2006 11:52 GMT-5
238 Another Side Entry: And I shall be a terrorist! 30/08/2006 10:37 GMT-5
239 Such Great Heights 28/08/2006 08:50 GMT-5
240 Thirsty Thursdays 24/08/2006 08:50 GMT-5
241 Two Things 20/08/2006 12:25 GMT-5
242 Motion Picture Soundtrack 20/08/2006 03:41 GMT-5
243 Skips the Record 18/08/2006 11:53 GMT-5
244 Side Entry:...In My Mind 16/08/2006 10:41 GMT-5
245 Sorry For Not Taking Your Order 15/08/2006 10:15 GMT-5
246 Give 'em De Run Now 10/08/2006 01:02 GMT-5
247 Otakon 2006 06/08/2006 09:02 GMT-5
248 It's Comcastic 02/08/2006 10:30 GMT-5
249 Old Newspapers 28/07/2006 08:33 GMT-5
250 Yeah Pepto Bismol! 22/07/2006 10:18 GMT-5
251 Huh, what now? 21/07/2006 10:17 GMT-5
252 Only in Dreams 13/07/2006 05:52 GMT-5
253 I Can't Help But Laugh 08/07/2006 09:52 GMT-5
254 All Good Things Must Come to an End 04/07/2006 09:18 GMT-5
255 Yesterday... 01/07/2006 08:48 GMT-5
256 I only kick ass and chew gum; I'm all outta gum 30/06/2006 09:20 GMT-5
257 Speak Like No One's Listening 27/06/2006 09:33 GMT-5
258 A Fool Among The Many 24/06/2006 09:19 GMT-5
259 Cough Cough 21/06/2006 10:12 GMT-5
260 What More Could You Want? 20/06/2006 09:18 GMT-5
261 Ask a Bi-yotch! 19/06/2006 10:33 GMT-5
262 A Beautiful Let Down 17/06/2006 09:04 GMT-5
263 O, The Places You May Go 15/06/2006 09:08 GMT-5
264 ECHO (Echo, echo...) 11/06/2006 08:58 GMT-5
265 Insert Something Clever Here 09/06/2006 10:08 GMT-5
266 This Entry Was Custom Made By The Juggernaut 07/06/2006 10:29 GMT-5
267 Inhale... 06/06/2006 10:04 GMT-5
268 And so I said to my doctor... 05/06/2006 11:45 GMT-5
269 Who dat is? Dat my baby daddy! 04/06/2006 09:06 GMT-5
270 We Don't Need No Edjewkayshin! 01/06/2006 09:15 GMT-5
271 Who Wants To Date a Hundredaire? 31/05/2006 06:54 GMT-5
272 Ask a Bitch 30/05/2006 09:04 GMT-5
273 Fellowship of the Lube 28/05/2006 11:48 GMT-5
274 Ya Habibi! 26/05/2006 09:23 GMT-5
275 Shake Your Bon Bon 25/05/2006 09:59 GMT-5
276 I Thought I Found What I Always Wanted 22/05/2006 11:49 GMT-5
277 Hooray for Boobies! 21/05/2006 09:42 GMT-5
278 A Lot Better Now Than Just OK 19/05/2006 03:26 GMT-5
279 600th Entry Not-So Extravagant Extravaganza!!!! 17/05/2006 11:32 GMT-5
280 *cough* Biotch *cough* 17/05/2006 02:28 GMT-5
281 More Filler 16/05/2006 12:18 GMT-5
282 And It Could Be Yours For Only Free.99 16/05/2006 02:32 GMT-5
283 I want my funk uncut 15/05/2006 11:24 GMT-5
284 Put Down the Ducky! 12/05/2006 11:31 GMT-5
285 And Now He's Back From Outta Space 09/05/2006 06:36 GMT-5
286 Round 3 08/05/2006 12:39 GMT-5
287 Fake Sound of Progress 04/05/2006 09:24 GMT-5
288 Save The Last Email for Strongbad 03/05/2006 10:15 GMT-5
289 Lack of Sanity Please 30/04/2006 12:29 GMT-5
290 Money Can't Buy Happiness, So I'll Have to Rent It 26/04/2006 10:41 GMT-5
291 I Wish You Were Here 25/04/2006 01:29 GMT-5
292 Ryanne Really Satisfies 25/04/2006 01:07 GMT-5
293 You'd Kill Yourself for Recognition 23/04/2006 06:34 GMT-5
294 An Unusual High 21/04/2006 03:02 GMT-5
295 One Pill Atta Time 20/04/2006 02:17 GMT-5
296 Half-Eaten Sandwhich 18/04/2006 11:28 GMT-5
297 Past should be kept there. 18/04/2006 11:20 GMT-5
298 My heart still sinks... 16/04/2006 12:17 GMT-5
299 The Anniversary 16/04/2006 07:57 GMT-5
300 Other Ways to Masterbate 14/04/2006 11:05 GMT-5
301 Changing Orbit 13/04/2006 11:14 GMT-5
302 577 entries ago... 13/04/2006 03:07 GMT-5
303 Plus Size Porn Star 11/04/2006 03:14 GMT-5
304 Self-Centered (Comments Optional) 09/04/2006 10:24 GMT-5
305 16 Things to Do at WalMart 08/04/2006 10:20 GMT-5
306 Human Affection 07/04/2006 02:00 GMT-5
307 Random Questionaire